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It was the same amount time since I walked in on Rita and her pillow. The biggest difference was that with the Soul, I was able to expand my search area for a new place to live.The idea was to find a piece of land already developed to cut down on the cost of the move. But for it to be developed, it usually meant a house of some kind would already be standing on the property. I was perfectly happy with the travel trailer, but I wasn’t married to it.A cousin of Lucy and me owned part of our grandfather’s farm. It seemed like a good idea to ask her about selling me a piece of it. So when I met her after six month out of joint, I did just that. She had suggested that I stop by and take a look at the old place. If I saw anything I liked we could talk about me buying it.I followed her directions to a gravel road two miles down the county road from Lucy’s place. I turned right on to the, not so great, gravel road. I decided it could use a couple of more truck loads of gravel. A hundred. But I did say it ... and ... I meant it."No ... Ian. It's too soon. You've only just appeared again. I'm not ready to make that kind of commitment again. I've tried once and failed. I can't let myself fail again."I could tell by the tone of her voice that I had surprised her and she wasn't ready to consider a permanent arrangement."I'm sorry, Bernie. That was a stupid thing for me to say. I know it's too soon and I know you have to be certain. I do love you, but I can wait. Hell, I've waited this long, I can wait until you know for certain." Ian, it's been years since we've been close. I'm surprised that you're so sure I'm the one for you. I know I'm not there yet ... and ... maybe it won't happen," she said, searching my face for my reaction."I want to believe it will. I'm acting out my dream." It was at that moment that I knew I didn't want to leave Ontario without Bernie."It's too soon to say, Ian, if it will turn out the way you hope," she said."I'll hold the thought that it's.
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